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Sacred sexuality
By Lexi Fisher

Have you ever had sex and wondered, "Is this all there is?" Just asking this question takes courage and the nerve to begin exploring other possibilities in an area that has so many taboos. But if you have asked, your answer may be found in Tantra Yoga, the Yoga of Sacred Sexuality. This is the practice of bringing full awareness into your body- breath, movement and voice. Tantra Yoga is the practice of reawakening your authentic spontaneity and celebrating the divine within yourself and your partner. It is a practice that connects sex with spirit.

Tantra is often translated as "weaving"-the weaving of opposites such as spirit and matter, light and shadow, male and female, expansion and contraction-into the tapestry of our lives. It is a path of self-discovery. As we practice accepting all parts of ourselves, healing shame and self-criticism, we become more whole and can then accept the shadow in ourselves and others. This acceptance, this "Yes" to life, is the attitude that allows us to dive into the realms of sacred sexuality.

Our body is a temple of the Divine and honoring our senses is a wonderful way to practice staying fully in the present moment, in the Now. Tantra has sixty-four arts that bring ritual into our lives to bridge the gap between ordinary life and the sacred. These include: preparing and serving food, flower arranging, making incense and perfume, dancing, singing, playing music, writing poetry, massage, the use of herbs, and adornment. As we practice these arts and learn the magic of being present in each activity, we enter a gateway into the sacred. Japanese Tea Ceremony is an example of this. Each detail is performed with complete awareness creating the doorway to experience presence and deep peace in a simple action, such as pouring hot water into the tea bowl. Just doing this is an opportunity to wake up and remember who we are. Anything we do with full awareness becomes sacred. Our whole life can become a meditation, an opportunity to remember who we are and bring our presence into every area of our life.

Tantra is also called the Yoga of Relationship. There are many spiritual paths that are solitary and celibate. Tantra Yoga is a spiritual path that is in the world, in the nitty gritty of our daily lives. Our partner is our "beloved" and at times, as my partner Kip says, our "beloved button pusher"! Just as musical instruments need to be tuned to play together, so do we. One of our favorite Tantric exercises to deepen intimacy is the "melting hug."  Looking into your partner's eyes, move toward each other with full awareness and be mindful of any thoughts or feelings as you approach. As you embrace, allow all parts to
touch, there are no nasty bits, all of you is sacred. Synchronize your breathing and let your bodies melt, again witnessing any thoughts and feelings. Continue to breathe together three to five full minutes. Let this be a meditation for you both as you feel yourselves come into resonance. When we take time to synchronize our breath, slow down and come into harmony, we can make Divine music.

The power of sexual energy can also be employed for our transformation and healing. After all, sexual energy creates new life. This is a very powerful force. With Tantra techniques sexual energy is redirected from our genitals up, rather than out, bathing our entire body, energizing and rejuvenating us. Rather than a genital sneeze we experience orgasm in our whole body. As we practice non-attachment at the height of desire we move from just having an orgasm to being orgasmic.

Many of us have had experiences of "spiritual sex" when we felt our soul connect with our partner's soul. Some people have even said they were sure they had conceived during this lovemaking, and in fact they had. These are times when all the elements were right and they spontaneously felt a deep spiritual connection with their partner. Tantra Yoga techniques enable us to cultivate this spiritual sexual connection so these experiences aren't just a matter of chance.

Using the Tantric arts we can create a sacred space with flowers, candles and incense. By committing to see the divine in your partner (which at times isn't easy.) you see what it is that you really love about them. Now invite God, however you understand God, to be present in your sexual loving. This sets the stage to practice the Tantric techniques that enable you to move from repression to expression of your full ecstatic potential.

Lexi Fisher and Kip Moore have been practicing Tantra Yoga together for nine years. They have studied with the great Tantra Yoga teachers: Charles and Caroline Muir, Margot Anand, Bodhi Avinasha, and David Deida. They teach weekend workshops, advanced residential retreats, men's and women's groups and private sessions. Currently they hold weekly: Monday evening meditations at Urban Yoga Center, and Thursday evening alternating Men's groups and Women's circles. February 28- March 2 they are teaching Cobra Breath Level 1, Living in Bliss and Discover your Magnificence.

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